I was somewhat shocked at how forceful Henbane was with me... before the class started (the Poison Plants as Medicine class with Kathryn Solie), I rubbed a little homemade Henbane ointment on the soles of my feet and immediately felt a strong presence. I would describe the presence as a multi-faced spirit, everything from chaos and destruction to gentle, passive, peace was felt all at once.
During the journey, Henbane was whisking me away before we had barely started. I was taken to a time somewhere during the time of Vikings and landed on this ground that was mountainous.
Henbane shifted energy from this almost nuisance like child who had whisked me away to a nearly intimidating and serious spirit circling me, looking me up and down. I could tell that I was being judged for my spirit... to see if "it is time" (is what it felt like).
When guides came in Odin and Freya were there.
Henbane showed me this woman in a cave, away from town. They told me that she was me and that I chose to live away from town in this cave amongst the wolves. Then said "You need to remember the difference between fear and respect... your presence commands respect, you don't have to be feared."
This hit me really hard because even in this lifetime, I have had people fear me because of who/what I am. They have been afraid that I would read them or see things about them that they were hiding. These experiences have been very painful and obviously need to be healed.
Henbane showed me that she (me) chose to live outside of the town/tribe and that the people were not afraid of her but respected her very much which is why they left her to herself unless they needed her healing.
We went to her cave and she was very comfortable. It was obvious they cared for her very well. From a distance I watched her dancing, working and howling in her cave while the light of the fire licked the cave walls all night long. I was in a trance and wanted to be with her so badly.
She left the cave and we followed. Henbane told me to walk behind her and then merge with her fully. As I did, I heard the plants come alive. They were speaking to her in an audible voice... all of them. But it was Henbane she was walking towards. Henbane was telling her about a boy in the village who was depressed/mentally sick and disconnected from reality and that he needed her help. She greeted the plant and put a Henbane flower on her tongue (this is the second week that upon greeting the plant, a flower was put on my tongue).
Henbane told the woman what to harvest and how to heal this boy. We walked back to the cave, having merged with the woman. The wolves walked around us and watched us from a distance but they too had incredible respect for us. When we returned to the cave the boy was there and we made a Henbane poultice and put it over his lips, eyes and ears to heal him.
That was it. It was the deepest and most detailed journey I have ever had and I can still feel it inside me. I expressed my gratitude to Henbane and they said "It is I who needs you, thank YOU".
This is a reocurring theme for me with plants and animals and ancestors... them showing and expressing gratitude to me because I am the one who is in the physical body and is able to aid and assist them. It feels like a heavy load to carry but I know the work is necessary and I know why I am here.
Met Belladonna at the edge of the forest, with an ocean/cliff behind me.
I originally thought the ocean and cliff was symbolizing emotional healing (and it still may be) but upon recalling the journey I realized this symbolized there is no going back, there is no where to turn and run.
A tall bright light of a spirit called me into the forest, but she intended for me to come alone (without guides). She led me to a patch of Belladonna. As she savored a berry, she offered me a flower and told me to put it on my tongue at which time my entire back body (rear energy centers) lit up.
She parted the plants and led me down into the earth via a set of earthen stairs. She encouraged me to connect with the details and senses of the soil around me. She showed me that the roots of belladonna are the body and the above ground aspects are her spiritual expression/wisdom/spiritual channels.
She whispered into both of my ears but I don't remember or couldn't hear what she said, it had to do with listening for something in the weeks to come. There was also a feeling that she was opening or enhancing my energetic ear channels.
I see a throne in front of me and hear/feel "Royalty" and I know this is referring to me.
Datura enters as a big white bloom and as my focus sharpens, the bloom turns into flame.
"Dress yourself in white, cover yourself in my blooms and remember who you are" she says.
Blue jay staring at me, took me into his wing then I was flying on the back of a dragon over "lands of time"... to the beginning of time.
Datura speaks again- "sister","let go of control and walk with me", we "raised" each other.
She appears to me as a beacon from a lighthouse- a guiding light, a focus light. "Fade out the noise, and focus on being."
The Monkshood that came to me are Inter dimensional beings. The "Council" summoning me to join them. Monkshood seems to be a "we" or "us" rather than a "he", "she" or "they".
An old grandmother ancestor shows up. She worked with the council as well. She had a hut in the woods and a circle behind her house where they would gather (like a portal).
With her bare hands she dug the roots of Monkshood, took them inside, boiled them in a cauldron and made a paste then offered me some. She briefly mentioned or motioned at the skin, as if it would heal skin issues, or as if that is where I should put the ointment.
Monkshood says "few understand us as the being we are, we bring transmissions for the evolution of humanity". "Before you go.." they marked me with a symbol on each shoulder and the third eye "so it will be known that you have been chosen and that YOU choose to aid us with the evolution".
Crowhurst Yew Tree, Surrey, thought to be 4,000 years old
YEW TREE (2019)
A spirit walked up to me and took my hand, motioning me to a forest of trees. We passed a long long looooong line of people standing in line, waiting to meet with the Yew.
The spirit sat me down in front of Yew and we sat in silence for a while as I watched ripples of consciousness, visible as colors, flow from the center of the trunk out the branches all the way to the tips of the limbs (psychedelic) color after color after color, continuously. As I watched, I could feel my own ripples of consciousness moving.
Yew reaches a limb to me and grabs at my person and says "take this off so we can see the real you/yew" (The play on words was lost to me at this point and wasn't until after the journey that I realized what was truly said). A very very old male ancestor, leads me deeper into the forest and below ground. He is showing me and telling me how to communicate with the roots.
Standing with Yew again, the center of the Yew tree opens and invites me inside. "You are my equal" and repeats "take this off so we can see the real you/yew".
"Discipline" is a theme feeling during this journey. Yew is working with me on realizing complete embodiment- showing me that my inner realms are what ripple out from me to others, not necessarily my words or actions even that matter most, but my inner experience and truth.
Two black panthers/jaguars show up.
I am in a field with a fairy-like energy around me. "Community" feelings/influence. Trickster/Shapeshifter.
Draw information through the crown and let it be channeled through the roots/body as a network of information to share with others.
Mandrake people are channels of other worldly information. Messengers. Spirit Travelers. Assimilate and digest, then share for the benefit of the whole.
AMANITA MUSCARIA (2019) Mycelial networks. Deep Crone/Grandmother wisdom. "I want YOU to do the work of knowing who I am" "Take up space, there is more to you than meets to eye" Deep connection with Gaia. Caretakers of the Earth. MAYAN PRIEST & OUR BLACK CAT BODIES (2019) This journey was inspired by a medicine woman who created a Raven wing prayer fan for me. She also gifted me bones from a big cat. She suggested that I journey with my fan and meet with the spirit who lives in the center of the fan. The journey begins with me running through a damp forest/jungle at night. The light of the moon lit my path. I was aware of every noise, movement and being within a mile of me... and even farther if I needed. I seem to be racing towards lights, a fire lit temple in the distance. I feel incredibly alive. I notice I am no longer in human form, but am in the form of a large black cat. Another black cat is near and is soon running side by side. He communicates with me telepathically. I ask him "who are you" and he replies with a laugh "Ha! Who am I? I am your Priest and you my Priestess, we are mated in all lifetimes. In all lifetimes I will be there for you in one form or another." It feels incredible running together, the moon on our backs. I feel as if I own the night and all realms of the subconscious. We end up at a circle of beings, surrounding a fire. The temple off to our right. I have seen this council before but they have never removed their hoods until now. Each of them had the body of a human but the head of an animal. Some of the animals were familiar, some not. These beings feel as if they have always existed and continue to exist, while somewhat not existing at the same time... as if they choose. They spoke to me, covered themselves and then slowly backed into the jungle, in all directions, until they were no longer visible and I was alone.